June 29, 2002
11:44 PM  ()

FTFT...
if only it wasn't unrequited, if only he could look into my eyes and see how much there could be.

June 27, 2002
1:21 PM  ()

happy birthday, scott.
happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott. happy birthday, scott!!!!

June 26, 2002
3:25 PM  ()

it all comes back to you...

i love thrice.

June 25, 2002
10:37 AM  ()

Mary is the most fantastic person ever!!
I'm so glad I got to see her yesterday! And again tomorrow at the Propagandhi show! Bah! She's so great! I love her. She made me extremely nostalgic yesterday, I want to go back to Ontario with her so bad. So bad... so very bad. I'll get a picture of her tomorrow, she's pretty. And she got a picture of me running for Tom, fuck you Tom! Oh man... oh man.. Mary mary mary.. MARY!

June 21, 2002
3:13 PM  ()

does this make you feel better? it makes me feel better.

pretty flower, i like orange.


disgusting grass, the result of putting in a sprinkler system after the grass is already laid.


shut the fuck up.

June 19, 2002
11:30 AM  ()

exams suck.
extremely.
oh well, at least i don't have class with derek anymore. haha, just kidding derek. fucker.
my mom locked me out of the damn house this morning after my exam, that was kind of frustrating. so that's what i'm doing right now kids, exams. my last two are tomorrow. there will be more updates soon enough. i'm going to see jimmy eat world w/ moneen tonight though. i'm happy about this.
kirby. i want a job. make me strong. maybe i can lift 100 lbs. what do you people think? think i can do it? huh? 100 lbs of rocks? huh? i'm the weakest person alive, but maybe my weak body can prove us all wrong.

June 16, 2002
11:39 AM  ()

ugly pictures of sam.

June 13, 2002
6:44 PM  ()

r.i.p. jordan & dan...

a band from edmonton, an absolutely amazing band, Compromise, was in a car accident early this morning which claimed two lives of it's members. It's a tragic loss, especially for the friends and family. I hope the other band members are okay, and my sympathies and condolences go out to their families and friends.

June 12, 2002
7:09 PM  ()

happy birthday, clifford.
it's cliff's birthday. everyone, go say happy birthday to him on his messageboard. Excellent.

Listen: New Found Glory's new cd is actually really impressive, if you don't like them, fuck you. Don't pick it up.

So, I feel like a huge bastard lately, as I should I guess. I'm not at the point where I want to connect anymore, I want to just be alone, I want to use my wings for a while. If you people don't mind, do you? sigh. I can't stand hurting people. I try to avoid it as much as I can, but it's impossible, there's a point where you just have to, white lies never work for me, I can never tell them. But then again, I can't let a person go on thinking something other than what it actually is. It's horrible to do that to a person. I'm not stable enough to 'connect', as I said before.

School's almost over, this is exciting. Actually, it's not. Usually I'm really pumped. I'll be fucking glad it's over once I'm out for that first minute on that last day when I'm finished my exams. Two months of freedom. Yeah, that's right, girls, I'm going for grade 12. I think. I'm pretty sure I am, though. I'm a year away from graduating, so why the fuck not? I can do one more year, I hope. I'll find something to make sure I don't go completely insane before the year's finished. Heather might be coming to my school, and Steve, hopefully that turns out as an "are coming to my school".

Someone asked me why I hate love the other day. I don't hate love. Love is a fabulous thing when you want to feel it. I just don't have any of that kind of love to give, therefore I won't be able to feel it. I don't want to, right now. So, I don't hate love, okay? Love is fine. But see, alone is better right now. If only it could be respected and accepted easily.

June 09, 2002
1:46 PM  ()

i try to speak, but no one hears.

JOCELYN BROKE IT!!!! hehe.

June 08, 2002
9:49 PM  ()

rich jones is hot.
tonight is horrible. the weather has been so bad all day. jocelyn came over earlier, we watched skate videos because there was really nothing else to do. then we rehearsed our play right in front of heather. heh. that was probably the funnest part of the day. i'm goin' to see alex tomorrow though, going to watch some movies. etc. excellent. good movies too. a clockwork orange, requiem for a dream, and some other movie that i haven't seen that's apparently good.

remember the feeling that you used to get when you were younger after you went to a movie with your friends? either that guy you liked or that girl you liked was there... remember? that giddy "i had fun" feeling? i wish i could have that right now. i kind of miss it. just for one night. heh. sigh. those days were funny... but then again, i don't really miss them, i just want to feel that right now. there's nothing else to do. hah, so make me twelve again.

June 06, 2002
9:03 AM  ()

breakfast where the news is read,
television children fed,
bullet strikes the helmet's head.

when will you learn that silence

is so much more attractive?

you always gave me a false sense of security...

and now you're gone again.

June 01, 2002
11:14 AM  ()

look, the sea just parted.
"why do you gotta be so proud? i'm the one with lipstick on..."

anyway, last night was fun. i quite enjoyed last night. hung out with sean for a bit, hung out with alex. he bought me a jones soda. this made me happy. see, i like jones soda. 'tis great. i was barely in the show, unless i needed to go to the bathroom. we all hung out by alex's car or in alex's car, recieving hugs from random people. it was a blast. although there was one depressing side to it, heather (not me) lost her grandmother yesterday morning, and she broke down last night. phil and i took care of her though. sigh, the pain of losing another is horrible. a lot of people passed on yesterday or on that date, yesterday was roger's death anniversary (i saw his sister in subway, heather got fired... again, not me), and sean's grandfather passed on yesterday as well. losing someone is such a sad thing, i hope everyone's okay. i miss roger and his big comfy fuzzy blue pants and sweater. reminded me of the cookie monster. :) aw.

goin' to see knucklehead tonight, i'm cleaning right now actually, well, going to start. i owe heather's dad ten dollars, and i need the other ten for tonight. i need to quit smoking.